Saturday, September 19, 2009

The Contractor Contest.....

I am so sorry to have gone MIA again. I have not had access to the Internet since my last post. The contractor finally showed up to begin the face lift to our little cottage and brought with him a few quirks, like using our Internet connection to surf and down load music and movies to his lap top rather than working on the house, so, we had to disconnect it temporarily.

I have found that hiring a contractor has much in common with a beauty pageant. Seriously! First you have the contestants, in this case the contractors. And, you have the judges, Handy Hubby and myself. Since Handy Hubby is much wiser in these things he got to be Judge #1 and I could chime in my opinion as Judge #2.

Just like in a beauty pageant you have the initial line up and introduction of the contestants. Contestant #1 came as highly recommended, showed up in a timely fashion with a wealth of knowledge of and experience. Contestant #2 showed up a little late with and attitude of being "Simply the best in the business!" (His words, not mine. He really wanted to win.) Contestant #3 was disqualified as he never showed up to the line up and introduction.
The fashion portion of the contest was of little consequence as all the contestants wore the same costume; sturdy work boots, jeans, t-shitrs, and ball caps. But the talent and question portion of the contest was where it really counted. Both Contestant #1 and #2 could flip and zip a tape measure with lightning speed, scribble numbers on a sheet of paper with great accuracy, and with a flick of a wrist hand over staggering figures to the judges.

During the Q&A session, Contestant #1 scored high in his superior skills and vast knowledge of the subject at hand. Contestant #2 was brash and abrasive and lost serious points with Judge #2 as he kept flashing cell phone photos under her nose to look at all the magnificent tile work he had done in his bathroom. Judge #2 was thinking how she did not want her little cottage to be tiled to look like a glorified outhouse! OK, she did not want her little cottage tiled at all! Maybe he was just nervous and misunderstood the questions.

After thanking and dismissing the contestants Judge #1 and Judge #2 sat down to tally the scores. Hands down Contestant #1 was the winner. He showed great poise in placing his bid, his experience spoke for itself, he came highly recommended, and had a great personality. Judge #2 could just not get past the tile thing, so tossed out Contestant #2 right away. A winner was declared and a date set for the winner to begin to fulfill his duties.
But, as seems to be the norm these days in pageants, there was a scandal! Contestant #1 failed to show up for his duties and was nowhere to be found. When he finally did show up he tried to extort more money from the judges by changing his bid to the tune of an additional $3,000.00! Needless to say he was stripped of his title and another pageant had to be held. A new winner was declared and hope was once again renewed.

The new eager beaver contestant showed up a week earlier than expected and a twitter of excitement at seeing the work began filled the hearts of the judges. However, after the first day they knew that something was wrong, very, very, wrong and they began to question their judging skills.

The crew of two with the possibility of a third man to help turned out to be a crew The crew of one brought his computer with him and you already know the rest of that story. Very little progress has been made but I have to say his craftsmanship is top notch. I expect it may take at least the rest of next week for him to complete the job upon which he will have earned the cash prize.
So, if you do not hear from me it is because we have once again cut off the Internet. I am going to try and get a few posts done and scheduled so if I don't visit or respond to your comments you will know why. Choosing a contractor was almost as taxing as choosing the actual materials and colors for the house, but that is a story for another day!

I hope you are all having a wonderful day.

Miss Sandy


LiLi M. said...

At least you didn't loose your sense of humor Miss Sandy, I always get a little depressed with working people over the floor, knowing that every phone call they make with their friends, every cigarette they smoke (outside the house) will cost me money, no matter what! I have called our house painter to finish his job, only a few minor things, but he didn't call back, of course, what did I expect? To tell you the truth; I'm even a little relieved! Keep smiling Miss Sandy, we'll see you around in due course, in the mean time have a nice weekend!

Anonymous said...

I am almost certain you have been judging the exact same contestants that Nalley and I did!!!
P-A-T-I-E-N-C-E!!! Oh, and by the way, the "judge's" names get changed to "Sit" and "Wait!"

Anonymous said...

OMG!! That is the funniest thing I've heasrd in awhile!
I suggest keepiong that sense of humor during the' ALWAYS comes in handy :)
Take pics of before and after....and the middle to so we can see!!

Anonymous said...

Man that was a perfect description. Quite original and entertaining. The last ordeal we had was the addition of another hear/air system in our 2 story home. Where is the commitment to quality these days? Good luck

The Feathered Nest said...

We miss you sweet girl but know that all things work together for good and KNOW that whatever these contractors are doing for you will be wonderful!! Wishing you a blessed and restful Sunday, xxoo, Dawn

Barbara H. said...

I know that must have been frustrating -- though you told it in an amusing way, and I liked the little action guys there. It sounds like finding a contractor is as precarious as finding a good mechanic.

I just can't imagine the audacity of the guy using your computer!

I hope the rest gets peacefully and uneventfully and quickly and expertly done.

Claudia said...

Hang in there - contractors can be so frustrating! Hopefully, this one will finally get the job done and you can have your internet connection back!

Anonymous said...

At least you had a guy show up. The last job we needed contracted, we couldn't even get the guy to call us back. My DH thinks he is in the wrong business....

I hope the rest of the work is done quickly and efficiently ;o)

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