Friday, February 6, 2009

Beautiful Compromise.....

Compromise: A settlement of differences or blending qualities of two different things(photo courtesy of Cottage Style Decorating
learn how to decorate cottage style)

Beautiful living can sometimes incorporate the fine art of compromise. This week blending the qualities of two different people with two distinct tastes and two distinct ideas took place here at the Quill. In some cases a settlement was quickly reached and on others, the decision to make a final decision has been put on hold. We still have not figured out the perfect ottoman to suit both our tastes and needs BUT a headboard has been ordered and the decision was agreed upon and made in five minutes flat.

I think beautiful living as well as beautiful decor should include a mixture of tastes, styles, and personalities of those who inhabit the home together. Beautiful living is give and take considering the needs of the family above individual tastes especially if the preference of the one contributes to disharmony in the home.

I learned this lesson when my son was around ten years old. I had two very lovely rugs in our main family living space, OK, it is our only family living space. Our little cottage only has a main living room period! My ideal at the time was to have a show room not a living room. I was very fussy about those two rugs. "Don't step on those with your shoes on!" "Avoid the fringe at all costs, it's light in color and will get dingy if you step on it!" And so on. They were lovely and plush but I didn't want them actually used, difficult when one rested in front of the sofa and the other in front of the fireplace. The family intensely disliked those rugs and I stubbornly clung to them.

One day I was sitting alone in my perfectly appointed space and as I looked at those rugs I began to feel cranky about them. They were a lot of care in keeping them clean and the light colored fringe drove me nuts trying to keep it from getting spotted or straightening it out and my family complained about them all the time. I got up and rolled both those rugs up and tossed them onto the deck and instantly I felt better.

When my son arrived home from school he stopped still in his tracks in the doorway. His eyes darted around the room as he asked, "Where are the rugs?" "I got rid of them." "Really?" he replied, "Like, for good?" "Yes." Fist pumping action and jumping up and down took place. Later in the evening as I was cleaning the kitchen I heard him tell his little sister that he was so glad that the fussy rugs were gone because now they could have a not so fussy mom.

Fussy was not something I wanted them to remember home as being. The next day I went shopping and found a compromise to the rug situation. I got two solid chenille rugs that looked great against the dark wood floors and drew out a color in the sofa. They were soft, plush, and best of all kid friendly machine washable. We used those rugs for years. When the color got dull I simply redyed them and they looked brand new again. This was a perfect compromise and blended the qualities of a happy family with a harmonious home. This lesson helped me to adjust my beautiful life goals from creating a showplace to creating a home.

What memories do you want to create through your decorating and design?

Melissa at The Inspired Room is hosting a link up for more ways to achieve beautiful life goals so be sure to visit!

Beautiful Blessings,
Miss Sandy


Anonymous said...

Hi Sandy, I love this post and the story about the rugs. That's wonderful news that you and hubby agreed on a headboard so quickly. Can't wait to see the final results. We've made a few changes with paint lately and moved Nalley's office to what was Mother's sitting room. Some of our choices with flooring etc. are made because of Harriet. She was older when we got her and occasionally has "accidents" but when I remember all the happiness that Harriet brought Mother and now Nalley, I don't mind a bit. Years from now, a floor won't hold any special memories for me, but Harriet's unconditional love for us will. Best wishes with the updates - have a good weekend.

Vee said...

Oh I have been a fussy mom at times for sure about things. I displayed my great-grandmother's cocoa pot on the mantel in the living room for years and it was always a "you'd better not knock that down and break it." Why I didn't place it where it was less likely to get tunked, I don't know. My son even went so far as to ask me once if I'd still love him if he did break the cocoa pot. Yikes.

So these are good lessons learned and good lessons shared. Thank you, Miss Sandy!

I'm still eager to know what ottoman you'll decide upon.

Fifi Flowers said...

I would love to spend the day lunging in that beautiful room... book in hand!
ENJOY your day!

Teresa said...

Beautiful picture-
We have had tile floors through out the main living area of the house since the time my children were little- just so I wouldn't be remembered as the Mother who nags- :}
Now my grandchildren come over and there is no worry.
Thanks for a great post.

Susie said...

Well I'm glad you and hubbie came to agreement on the headboard; and so quickly at that!

Girl you know I'm no decorator so I don't guess I really create memories doing so.

I hope you have a wonderful weekend Sandy.

marmee said...

hello sandy,

these last few posts are what i describe as marriage. marriage=compromise. i hope you two can come up with an ottoman solution. having to move things around does always lead to fixing up in one way or the other. since we downsized to the farm house a year and 9 months ago i have rearranged so many times trying to make things fit. my last effort at the end of last year led me to know i had to get rid of some stuff. so i did. it feels librating in some ways.
i finally left you a proper thank you on my blog for the lovely recipe card you gave me. i have found a place in my kitchen to put it on display. so i think of you often.

kathy said...

SAndy - yes life has things that we need to compromise about -- With me it is holding on to things - I might use one day , and truly - things I had form 5 yrs ago are now being used for craft things with the mission kids -- at least that is my excuse -- Things packed awy as very very sentimental are different -- but things you no longe remember -- just bog down life and take up space -- where freedom needs to be -- even the freedom of a crowded mind, always in the back of your mind to be freed of those things we drag around with us .
you know the one day soons of I wills !! Whew sweet Sandy - this is good therapy -- KAthy - ga

Gina said...

What a great story and a great reminder of how important compromise is-with three kids and a whole bunch of their friends in my house I need to remember that home is for them to live in too! It'll be most comfortable and beautiful if there are more "do's" than "don'ts".

Thanks for sharing!

Laura Ingalls Gunn said...

People are often suprised when visiting me home to find that a decorator actually just lives in her house instead of it being "photo ready". :)

Bre said...

...loved this post about the "Fussy Rugs" ... and "Fussy Moms " LOL

I'm thrilled that your friends was inspired to do a wreath. I'd love to see it !

And please stop by my blog for a little award . No worries if you don't do award ....I know not everyone does.


bluemuf said...

Hi Miss Sandy, I'm doing catch up to-day. I love coming you your beautiful spot on the web and refreshing my soul. I just love this story of the rugs. I shows that sometimes we just have to sit back and take in the whole picture of what is important.

Thank you for sharing your wisdom
Hugs karen

Melissa @ The Inspired Room said...

Great post, Miss Sandy! So much inspiration and wonderful lessons, thank you for sharing!!


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